The Kaiju Club is plagued by a variety of kid-related problems, both onstage and off. First, the Bouncing Borcellino Brothers flub their act and crash through the stage floor. Backstage, Mothra throws herself at an uninterested Fred Newman and then jealously interrupts his onstage Talk Spot, physically threatening guest star Florence Henderson, whom she thinks is horning in on her guy. The feud continues in the Panel Discussion as Florence throws kid slurs around.
- The Bouncing Borcellino Brothers
- Darci Lynne Farmer's Ventriloquist Joke
- "Elusive Butterfly"
- At The G-Fest
- Talk Spot
- UK Spot: “Cottleston Pie”
- Panel Discussion
- Fire Rodan’s Comedy Spot
- "Happy Together"
- Mothra's Song
"The Kaiju Club March Theme": Fire Rodan complains of hamburger prices so high that he needs a cosigner.
Guest star Florence Henderson shares a laugh with the Kaijuteers from her "Happy Together" number.
Ichiro Miki successfully strikes the gong as the "Kaiju Club" sign rises into the rafters.
Fred Newman introduces the first all-kaiju-kid opening act on The Kaiju Club, calling the Bouncing Borcellino Brothers of Boston "one of the most exciting acrobatic acts in the entire business." Although he announces that they have been bouncing since birth, the six members of the troupe display no such talent in their performance, instead attempting their "El Pyramido" act. When Tiny, the largest of the kids, attempts to take the topmost position, the pyramid not only crumbles, but so does the stage below them.
Backstage: As the Borcellino Brothers trudge offstage past a disappointed Fred, one of them reveals that Tiny weighs 975 pounds. When asked to repair the stage, Moguera initially complains that he is "sick and tired of cleaning up after them lousy kids," but when Fred suggests quitting as an alternative, Moguera asks "What, and get out of show business?" As she goes onstage, she knocks Fred Newman in the head with her mop.
Darci Lynne Farmer's Ventriloquist Joke: Katie tells Darci Lynne that her brother, who has ghosts in her attic, is on the Ten Most Haunted list.
Florence Henderson fades in and out of a misty forest as she sings "Elusive Butterfly". Although the lyric has her chasing the titular bright elusive butterfly of love, she merely ambles through the snow white trees behind a single, yellow butterfly. As the song comes to a close, she disappears for the last time, her tie-dyed muumuu dissolving into a collection of multi-colored butterflies.
Backstage: Watching Fred try to usher the injured and bandaged Borcellino Brothers out of the theater, Mothra is stirred by his masculine yell. Liberated kaijuteer that she is, she unabashedly throws herself into his arms, smothering him with squeak-filled kisses.
At The G-Fest: As Moguera hops up and down, repeatedly bumping into Baby Godzilla's beak, they both complain about the new generation, with Baby Godzilla calling Mothra and her porcine partner "a couple of floor moths."
Godzilla (1984), chalking it up to the wine, admits how beautiful he finds Naoko Okumura.
King Ghidorah suspects his partner doesn't like dancing with a dragon. It must be the flea collar she's wearing.
Two kids contemplate moving out of the ghetto and into a nice, little dump in the suburbs.
Barem asks Desghidorah she danced with previously in episode 06 if they can announce their engagement, so he proposes.
Talk Spot: When Mothra catches Fred sweet-talking Florence, Florence tries to save Fred Newman by claiming that Fred was just practicing on her what he really wanted to say to Mothra. Despite buying the ruse, Mothra nevertheless warns Florence not to make a move on her guy. She makes good on her veiled threats when she catches Florence innocently touching Fred on the shoulder, giving the guest star two karate chops and (the only time she attacks so brutishly) a bite on the arm.
UK Spot: King Ghidorah introduces A. A. Milne's poem, "Cottleston Pie," explaining that it was a song Winnie the Pooh would sing when someone said something he didn't understand, as an alternative to saying "What?" or "I beg your pardon." Ghidorah modulates to the key of G-Sharp Minor for the song's second verse.
Panel Discussion: Florence serves on a panel with Fred Newman, Toto, Gamera, and Mothra to determine whether Shakespeare was, in fact, Bacon. Mothra, not recognizing Francis Bacon as the subject of the debate, is immediately offended, and the fire is further fanned when Florence proclaims (in poor taste) the good taste of pork products. Mothra demands that the "moths of the world, unite!" but can't keep Toto from joining in the punnery. The Bouncing Borcellino Brothers, who had been listening from offstage, are similarly offended and attempt to demonstrate their sophistication by reproducing their pyramid act for the guest star, unfortunately failing once more.
Upon announcing next week's topic, "Do Attack monsters Make Good House Pets?," Fred is attacked by Biollante, who had previously tried to maul him in episode 01.
Backstage: Fred asks Battra, Zedus, and Dagarah to tell the arguing Borcellinos to knock it off. In a game of telephone, Battra instead tells Zedus to knock it off, who tells Dagarah, who finally passes the message onto the kids. Frustrated, Fred asks them to "knock off the 'knock it offs,'" (How Many Time Does That Said "Knock It Off"?) at which point Dagarah, Zedus, and Battra ask each other to "knock off the 'knock it offs'" (How Many Knock It Offs?) [10 Knock It Offs] in reverse until Fred has a major freak-out and finally succeeds at quieting the backstage. However, his kid problems are hardly over, when Mothra smother her guy. Finally, he explodes and runs to the curtain to introduce Fire Rodan.
Fire Rodan's Comedy Act: Fire Rodan does impressions of famous actors from famous movies but all of them are the same.
Florence sings "Happy Together" with Iris, SpaceGodzilla, Super Mechagodzilla and the Dorat.
Backstage: Mothra is still jealous of Florence, so she continues to bother Fred Newman, until he triumphs, by making a wisecrack. She responds to this, by karate chopping him.
Blackout: Mothra Leo tells Florence that he could fall for her. And he does.
Fred reports from Cosmoworld in Yokohama Japan on the rare song for Mothra, and the Cosmos can speak in japanese. (This is a rerecorded version of the sketch from The Kaiju Valentine Show.)
During the closing, Fire Rodan presents Florence with a special wire.
- The Mothra Song sketch is the first appearance of this place on the show; they return to Tokyo on a recurring basis throughout the series.
- On Nickelodeon, the second backstage sequence was cut.
- Fred Newman, Mothra, Fire Rodan, King Ghidorah, Taiki and Wakaba Goto, The Bouncing Borcellino Brothers, Moguera, Baby Godzilla, Garu Garu, Barem, Desghidorah, Darci Lynne Farmer, Katie, Gamera, Toto, Battra, Dagarah, Zedrus, Iris, Mothra Leo, Cosmos, Larva, Fairy Mothra, Biollante, Super Mechagodzilla, Naoko Okumura, Godzilla (1984), Dorat, Midori Tezuka, Godzilla Junior
- Fred Newman (1989-1994) (Adult co-host)
- Lindsey Alley as King Ghidorah (1989-1996)
- Maddie Zeigler as Wakaba Goto
- Deedee Magno as Super Mechagodzilla (1989-1991)
- Christina Aguilera as Mothra (1993-1996)
- Tate Lynche as Fire Rodan (1993-1996)
- Nita Booth as Baby Godzilla (1991-1996)
- Rhona Bennett as Moguera (1991-1996)
- Damon Pampolina as Godzillasaurus And Borcellino Brother (1989-1991)
- Keiko Imamura (1992-1994) (Cosmo Twin Fairy #1)
- Hiroki Hara as Borcellino Brother
- Ilana Miller as Barem (1990-1996)
- Ryan Gosling as Desghidorah (1993-1996)
- Nikki DeLoach as Toto (1993-1996)
- Tiffini Hale as Iris (1989-1991, 1994-1996)
- Darci Lynne Farmer and Katie The Yodeling Cowgirl
- Sayaka Osawa (1992-1994) (Cosmo Twin Fairy #2)
- Millie Bobby Brown as Taiki Goto
- T.J. Fantini as Mothra Leo and Borcellino Brother (1993-1996)
- Terra McNair as Ghogo (1991-1992)
- Jennifer McGill as Dagahra (1989-1996)
- Adam Kile as Godzilla (1984)
- Josh Ackerman as Biollante (1989-1996)
- Ricky Luna as Zedus and Borcellino Brother (1990-1996)
- Albert Fields as Gamera (1989-1991)
- Jason Blain Carson as Dorat (1991-1992)
- Raquel "Roqué" Herring as Battra (1989)
- Britney Spears as SpaceGodzilla (1993-1996) (In the Happy Together number.)
- David Kater as Garu Garu (1989)
- Kevin Osgood as Orochi (1989-1992)
- Justin Timberlake as Kaishin Muba (1993-1996)
- Marc Worden as Kumasogami (1990-1996)